I emailed a friend thusly a few days ago:
When was the last time academia was relevant outside of Ivory Towers?
Insofar as blogs are one vehicle for ideas – for academics and others – how relevant is all this really?
Who is shaping and driving feminism? Has it really come down to Valenti and Jill? Are these supposed to be our voices now? Since they’re being quoted in WaPo now, I guess so.
Depressing.
I’ve reached the point where I am calling myself a feminist because to explain why I’m not one would take too long, especially as I continue to believe in the basic precepts.
That’s a pretty extreme statement for me to make. I’ve gone back and forth on the third wave, but I’ve held steady on the feminism. But I have to be honest and consistent and apply to feminism one of the standards I apply to Islam: The adherents make the religion/the movement. If the adherents suck and do sucky things, leave the fucking religion/movement.
But, feminism does not have dogmas and it’s not authoritarian. It’s not actually a religion. Its “adherents” are not defined by a bunch of bloggers. There are millions of feminists in the world, most of whom are simple feminists like me — we believe in women’s equality and humanity and we believe a fight for our rights is a righteous fight. Beyond that? It’s a lot of noise and hot air.
I will admit that all this has convinced me that it’s not as important as I used to think it, to call oneself a feminist. If many young women don’t, but nevertheless believe in their rights and will fight for them, that is perfectly justifiable. I used to believe in the power of the word because I thought it crucial to frame a discourse around an idea that could be distilled to a core distinguishing word, that could be a rallying point for women to unite around. It was a label, and labels are important insofar as they help unite people of varying backgrounds under one aegis.
But if the discourse is fucked — and feminist discourse is totally fucked — the label by itself loses some potency.
“Feminist” is still a recognizable and useful label for me to use to subtly give the finger to all who would deny women their rights. It’s useful, but not only that. It’s also defiant.
But other than that? The feminist “community” — at least the only slice of it I’ve tasted — has made it pretty clear to me that I’m not welcome. The “of color” folks think I’m the wrong sort of “of color” person. The white folks think I’m the wrong sort of feminist (I don’t like head-scarves, you see). All the leftists think I’m the wrong sort of immigrant (successful, fluent in English and “documented”). Hell, I’m not even the right sort of liberal – I’m able-bodied, heterosexual, cis-gendered, financially self-sufficient and not on anti-depressants. And I don’t have a single tattoo – no, not even on my lower back. Even worse, I only occasionally hate myself for any of this.
Reading feminist blogs has made me so conscious of race-centric thinking that I can neither get away from my race, nor that of anyone around me. I catch myself thinking in race terms. I am way too conscious of white people and my brownness and differentness around them. I am always worrying a black or brown person will fuck something up and prejudice the white people against me because all “of color” folks are the same (white people are, naturally, individuals). I never used to think this way and I am tired of the clutter in my mind.
I’m tired of liberals. The circular firing squad. The endless policing of each other while the house burns down. I’m quite aware that the white bitches sitting atop feminism are not the enemy and not the problem and are not even making anything worse. But goddamn, I can’t stand them anyway.
And that is an attitude I didn’t used to have. I thought they were helping. I’ve now realized they are irrelevant and will remain irrelevant as long as other people from within their own movement keep shooting them down, and they keep running back to their tormentors and squealing, “Whip me harder!” It’s the masochistic tendencies as much as the internecine enmity that drives me up the wall.
If there’s anything I hate almost as much as the evil Republicans who won’t tax the oil bandits, it’s liberals. Liberals who can’t get shit done. Liberals who are hung up on terminology. Liberals who want to outdo each other in self-hatred. Liberals who’d rather get the ideology right than accomplish the goal. Liberals who’d rather destroy each other than the other side. Liberals who lose sight of the forest for the trees. Liberals who are so busy trying to get the messaging right that they forget to actually accomplish anything.
Liberals lost their edge on the intellectual front and the activist front with the rise of postmodernism. The conservatives managed to hold on to their sanity and are still able to talk about the real world, while liberals are busy debating if there IS a real world. Caught up in the glamor of their shoddy intellectualism, they have forgotten that their work wasn’t yet done when they decided it was time to start out-liberaling other liberals instead of outsmarting the fucking conservatives.
And of course, the conservatives took over and have been having a blast since.
Feminism, as I understand and love it, died with the second-wave getting old enough to start getting attacked for being old.
The third wave is so repellent to me now that I want it to die. If I see it as irrelevant now, I want it to stay that way. Maybe true adversity will unite us at some point in the future. But for now, fuck it.
Takin’ ball, goin’ home.
Filed under: Feminism, Socio-Political
I have never seen a better decluttering of a mind…
I love this post and I love you for writing it (the way my liberal loyalty has been challenged and kicked in the gut of late had left an open wound and and this post is like a salve) …everything else about this post as well…..did I say I love this post and you for…… :)
“Caught up in the glamor of their shoddy intellectualism, they have forgotten that their work wasn’t yet done when they decided it was time to start out-liberaling other liberals instead of outsmarting the fucking conservatives.”
Yup. Well said, and well targeted.
But you know what? What you said earlier was right. The young vocal web princesses aren’t the sum total of the movement or its wisdom. The more people willing to stand up, be feminists, and be something different from the reflexively guilt-driven non-analytical norm, the more options there will be for the silent ones who have things to say and the will to say them.
Thanks for the wonderful post Apostate. You certainly know how to tell it like it is, but with such eloquence!
This post describes many of the reasons why I stooped reading many Liberal blogs. I’m tired of Liberals trying to be ‘allies’ to everyone while silencing oppressed people who don’t fit their nicely carved niches.
As for the third wavers what do you think it will take for them to get back on track and unite?
Great post – I agree with much of the sentiment in it. With regard to the circular firing squad – I have to wonder now about sites from so-called liberals and now “ex” democrats who seem out to utterly destroy Obama now that the primary is over. I can understand not wanting to vote for him – but going from being pro-Clinton to wanting to destroy Obama (and thus presumably have President McCain) just makes no sense to me whatsoever.
[...] post from the Apostate. “The ‘of color’ folks think I’m the wrong sort of ‘of [...]
I have a neck ache from nodding in agreement with that post. Thanks for articulating what I’ve been feeling for quite some time Every now and then I check in with Feministing, Feministe, Panadagon, et al and find myself thinking “WTF”? . Why just a few days ago, I read on one of them a response to Linda Hirshmann’s article about intersectionality. She (sorry I don’t remember where I read it) said Linda was racist to insist on the necessity for men to be raised with the expectation that they will share equally in child rearing and housekeeping because many women of color have men that are incarcerated. I kid you not.
It’s all about feeling morally superior, not about making anyone’s life better. Luckily, there are other feminist blogs (and more general information blogs – some even written by men, no less) that are not bogged down in this group think political nitpicking.
“If there’s anything I hate almost as much as the evil Republicans who won’t tax the oil bandits, it’s liberals. Liberals who can’t get shit done”
I will likely always call myself a feminist. But this does drive me up a wall as well. And it’s not just a phenomenon in the blogosphere — some time in the 90s I stopped being involved with IRL feminist groups because I got so sick of spending hours in meetings that were all about “process” with no content or action. Decision-making by “consensus,” which means no decisions ever get made. I mean, yes, sure, let everyone express their point of view, but we probably won’t ever reach consensus on every tiny point so let’s just f***ing VOTE and move on!!! Then there were the endless “trainings” to spend whole weekends examining our privilege, required in order to be allowed to stay with this or that group.
While I understand concern for not steamrolling over anyone, and living life in an aware manner, this sort of focus on process-INSTEAD-of action is just what my mother would have called “cutting off your nose to spite your face.” Making a point but getting us nowhere, and driving off the more action-oriented people.
Great post, Apostate.
“But other than that? The feminist “community” — at least the only slice of it I’ve tasted — has made it pretty clear to me that I’m not welcome. The “of color” folks think I’m the wrong sort of “of color” person. The white folks think I’m the wrong sort of feminist (I don’t like head-scarves, you see). All the leftists think I’m the wrong sort of immigrant (successful, fluent in English and “documented”). Hell, I’m not even the right sort of liberal – I’m able-bodied, heterosexual, cis-gendered, financially self-sufficient and not on anti-depressants. And I don’t have a single tattoo – no, not even on my lower back. Even worse, I only occasionally hate myself for any of this.
Reading feminist blogs has made me so conscious of race-centric thinking that I can neither get away from my race, nor that of anyone around me. I catch myself thinking in race terms. I am way too conscious of…” race that I can’t seem to think of anything else…
WORD. Found you via Donna Darko. Amazing post.
Thanks, guys! Didn’t think I’d get a positive response on this, but good to know I’m not alone.
“The conservatives managed to hold on to their sanity and are still able to talk about the real world, while liberals are busy debating if there IS a real world.”
Ouch. Sad but true.
Personally, the title feminist has always been about my freedom, no matter how much it is hijacked by third wavers.
Let’s create a fourth wave.
I was laughing my guts out reading that post. I don’t know any of the particular people you were referring to but I know the general types. A most excellent rant.
When I was a professor of sociology, although my area was social change and development imbedded in historical sociology, I was amazed by the lack of the historical as well as the multicultural approach of some female sociologists who called themselves “feminists”. What struck me the most is the unwillingness to look beyond their narrow confines of the western feminist experiences which by itself is worthy of study given the non-negligable changes in attidudes in gender outlook. It seemed even more pedantic and full of hubris when the academic vocation takes on the mantle of activism and praxis. Although I never did stereotyped these feminists as “male bashers” as some of other colleagues in other disciplines often did, I did however find them totally oblivious of gender issues outside the western experience. They were unfortunatly less critical of the dispicable conditions of women in the third word (i.e., Indian subcontinent, Middle East, Africa).
I found that a very sorry state of neglect in informing students about the facts.
I agree with lots of what you said, but hell, I’m an expat. And I don’t think you should have to appologize for where you are in life, your looks, or what you’ve gained.
I’d known from a very early age (around 9) that I was a feminist, thanks to my mom. I never had a problem identifying myself as one, even throughout my teen years in a very conservative high school (in the ’80s). I think that embracing this philosophy as second nature for so long has enabled me to successfully challenge others who may not initially agree; when presented logically without alienation, it’s surprising easy to make a few non-followers at least question their beliefs. I’d like to think I’ve been exposed to quite a range of religious, cultural, and class backgrounds (I can make friends with anyone), and attempting to understand different perspectives never hurts.
When I first started reading feminist blogs, I was surprised at the number of readers who admitted to shunning the label until college, then taking many courses in feminist study (better late than never I suppose!). What amused me is when these same people would point to their body of learned knowledge to tell me why my POV was “wrong.” Mmmmmkay. They seem to discount all viewpoints based upon actual experience, if the arguments conflict with their own.
Focusing on life experience to shape my definition of feminism quickly allowed me to discover on my own what de Beauvoir pointed out long ago (of course I ingest some philosophy, but it was awesome to read her theories after figuring them out on my own to some extent): no matter what your background, feminism is necessary to define us as a constant, so we aren’t forgotten in our other identity variables.
Ok well, at least that’s one of the messages I get from her work. :)
Late to this post, as usual… Octo just linked, so here I am.
This:
Feminism, as I understand and love it, died with the second-wave getting old enough to start getting attacked for being old.
HAHAHAA!!!! (((copious sloppy southern kissses for Apostate)))
They don’t actually attack us for being old, they just ignore us totally or say patronizing stuff like “things are more complex now!” and remark on how we can’t really be expected to GET it (us poor aging dears).
And lots of times, I don’t get it, so maybe they have something there.
:)
[...] And the feminist blogosphere in particular seems so intent on self-flagellating at every turn (as Apostate mentioned a while back), and including anything and everything so that we’ve diluted what truly is a feminist issue, [...]
[...] [2] http://apostate.wordpress.com/2008/06/11/spilling/ [...]